Angus and the Monster

'Twas on a gloomy Loch Ness shore
Where cloudy mist had whitened
That Angus J McTavish saw
A thing that left him frightened.

While he sat on a forlorn bank
And knocked back many tipples
Despite the great amount he drank
He noticed lots of ripples.

And then a creature slowly rose,
A prehistoric classic,
Poor Angus dropped his flask and froze,
The creature looked Jurassic.

As he fled to the nearest inn
His tam-o'-shanter bobbled
And when he heard the monster's din
His sporran shook and wobbled.

When locals heard his drunken lilt
They thought he had gone crackers,
So Angus lifted up his kilt
And flashed them with his knackers.

These days he lives with ridicule,
He wishes they would knock less,
Although the jibes are mean and cruel
He still goes down to Loch Ness.

So if you're there and hear strange sounds
It may not be too risky;
If not old Nessie on her rounds
It's Angus pissed on whisky.


©

so clever and enjoyable, I can just picture poor ole Angus trying to drink Nessie away.. LOVED it my friend.

~ Daniel

Very good reminded me of that film the other day spy kids with the loch Nessy style monster?

I missed this when you first posted it silverhenge, glad I've found it now, hilarious stuff!

I was at the beautiful and mystical Loch Ness just before Christmas and I can happily report that I encountered neither Nessie nor Angus, pissed on whisky or otherwise - thankfully!

Great writing as always silverhenge, with excellent rhyme and flow.Thanks for sharing.

ptp x